I was sober; hardly scantily clad (another phrase appearing once in the...– Melissa McEwan (via callidorablack)
I’ve been forced to explain homosexuality to my kids (aged 3 and 4) because...– KateP, Internet commenter (via cocklordsimone)
vondell-swain: god what if like you’re in the wizarding world and just having a regular evening and you and your boyfriend have sex and then the next day you mention it and he’s like “what? no, remember, i was out of town yesterday” and you realize that it was somebody with a polyjuice potion and you NEVER KNOW WHO IT WAS
in sickness and in health.
life-love-rebellion: superlezly: This deserves a million reblogs. This is beautiful. i reblog this everytime. Everyone better fucking reblog this . aw so cute! <3 favourite thing on tumblr <3 I honestley don’t care if this “ruins” my blog, this is beautiful and deserves 534203294873 notes. WOW. This actually touched my heart. :’)
The shortest horror story ever:
-timeisrunningout: President Santorum.